Why Do We Keep Ourselves Hostages in the Name of Pride?

I woke up in the middle of the night thinking, “How could she do this to me?” After all of the things that I’d done for her! The more I reflect on it, the more dumbfounded I am. How could she possibly treat me this way? And then I start creating stories about how she’s going to regret what she has done.

This is all happening in my head, of course. I'm losing sleep to create stories that aren't going to change a thing. So I come back to the moment and get pissed for allowing myself to even go there. The story I created was just to make myself feel better, but it doesn’t really. So instead I take a deep breath and accept it for what it is. Then I tell myself to shut the hell up and go back to sleep.

Has this ever happened to you? Have you ever found that you’re holding yourself hostage in the name of pride? The one thing that would ultimately make us feel better is to not have the stories in the first place. Even though that is my goal, sometimes those middle-of-the-night moments still creep up me.
Damn it!

I believe it happens to all of us. But when it does, let’s do our best to be kind to ourselves and remember to not take other people’s actions personally. Take a moment to be with your ego and you’ll find that most of the time, it has nothing to do with us. Breathe, focus on what feels good and what your truth really is. My personal truth is that we are ALL connected. And this thought helps to quickly bring me back to the moment, humbles me and gets me out of the ego mode.